National State of Alert:
(as of 3-8-04)

Personal State of Alert:
(as of 3-8-04)

Reason for Personal State of Alert:
- So this is post-college life? Really? *shivers*

- The Passion of Christ featured a deleted scene where Christ called me out and told me "You're next"

Featured Links:
Diaryland.com
OnlineOnslaught.com
MSNBC.com
QuietAmerican.org
MoneyCentral.msn.com
Tremble.com
Weezer.com
Fool.com
GirlsArePretty.com

joelthecat.diaryland.com

Where Do I Want To Go?
2002-07-18 - 12:23 a.m.

Um, hi. I.. um.. sorry about that. I like to disappear for long spells, sometimes.

June was really cool. Really, really cool. July- well, July's been July- but June- now that was cool.

A couple of important things happened- I graduated (sorta, I walked at my graduation ceremony), saw my grandparents from Puerto Rico, had a chill week with the folks and the family, walked in the ocean at low tide on islands that appeared, danced with the devil under the pale moonlight, and went to Orlando for my 21rst birthday, where I got thrashed by Marvel Superheroes and Popeye at Islands of Adventure, went down a 100 ft slide at Blizzard Beach and experienced heaven on Earth going around the park on the tubes that surround the park, and then got drenched in a different way by the rain at MGM Studios, home of an elevator and a limo-coaster. Then there were the night-time festivities- trips to Waffle House, Smirnoffed No Mercy, surprise birthday cake and silly string fight (fun!), and a very, very safe night of debauchery at Disney's Pleasure Island, where I got fireworks at midnight on my 21st birthday, and got to enter clubs that denied me access minutes earlier in the night. I ordered my first drink at a bar, and still have the disco themed, orange flourescent cup. It was a time to remember...

...a time to kill.

Now, summer quarter has started, and I've been slack, just like with every one of my other classes. I'm jobless, as I sorta disappeared from the scene at Habersham when the department I worked in moved- and am kinda sorta trying to get a job, but not too hard, from a quicky print shop, and the Gap.

"Get yourself a wife, get yourself a job, you're living a dream, don't you be a slob" -Weezer

Yeah... very slack, bad, bad month. There's tons of money in my bank account I've been sorta chipping away at, as I'm now out of cash, but am using money anyway to buy essentials- dinner at decent restaurants, and the new Dave Matthews Band CD...

... and the Secret Garden on DVD, and Dude, Where's my Car, and... oh lord, what have I done?

It seems like it won't be getting any cheaper anytime soon. Shasta invited me to go to a water park this weekend at Jekyll Island (where??), and it'll be taking a dent of at least 15 bucks out my pocket. I... really need a job so I can afford to be doing this shit. My concept of money has been blown by June, and now, I'm digging a hole for myself... shiiiit.

Lessee, what else- love stuff. There's stuff going on... but I'm not really sorting it out well, mentally.

"Don't you think the story is wrong? The introduction kinda sung too long... you have to sing but you don't know a song" - Weezer

Let's sort by person- yay! Adam: Adam's a nice bloke who's been coming over to see me a bit recently. We kinda teased something started awhile back... something mighta happened if he let it, but he went home. We had some trial dates, and over "Spiderman," I pretty much decided that nothing was going to work between us. A month goes by, however, and I hang out with him for the first time when he, I, my roomie Chris and some other... oh dear- did I mention I moved? That's the other big thing! I moved!!

No more shitty, broken into, two bedroom apartment in the semi-ghetto. I'm living further North, closer to the water, at a nice place with 4 roomies, two (gay-coupled) guys and two chickies. I knew Mike and Chris forever beforehand, and they's are the super-rad... but added to the mix are Kristen and Tana... very, very nice chicks- other than the occasional Tana bite, which is kind of endearing, but a bit painful. The place is two stories, my bedroom is big and yellow, and all the rooms in the house are color coded works of art. It's a nice pad, worth the pretty-dern-high rent. More to come!

So yeah- Adam. He's an Irish Catholic boy who can't dance, but tries, and I love him for it... he's kinda cute, and is amusing sometimes, but also intentionally and sometimes unintentionally gets on my nerves. He's sorta pushed for a boyfriendish relationship with me, but I have resisted thus far, and will seemingly continue to resist. I would take him up as my fuckbuddy pet, but he apparently needs "love" to do things. Bah!

(Wow that sounded bad. Hah!)

Then there's Damien. Yeah, the same Damien from the beginning of this diary thing. He's still in Indiana, he's still finishing college, but the teased possibility of a road trip over to that region by Jonathan and Mike, and the fact that he ALMOST came to visit me earlier this month put him in my mind again, and yes, (sadly?), I still have feelings for him. I don't know how or if it'd work, but we spent a lot of time helping each other grow up and get through a lot of stuff... so yeah. I'm still loyal feeling. Is this affecting my ability to do other relationships? I don't know, honestly. Coupled with my generally LOW libido, it might be.

Lastly- there's Daniel, factoring into the equation. He's really cute and lives really, really close by- he's friends with my two chick friends, and has qualities that can be construed as annoying or endearing- but push towards endearing thanks to his cuteness. He acts pretty queer, but his sexuality always seemed a bit on the mysterious side- like it was never directly mentioned. Well... last nite, it offhandedly did, and he declared his straightness. The dude's flamier than my best friend Jesse... and it's a bit hard to believe- but I don't seek to draw him out the closet- I just wanna have fun with him. He said he wanted to do some drinking with me this weekend... so, if this happens... we shall see what shall happen! I just don't want to work it into a big deal.

Hmmmm... I know there's more. Oh yeah- getting your deposit back is a bitch. I spent a week trying to get in touch with my old landlord and fighting him for an extra $200 bucks I got screwed out of, and I still have to try and get 200 bucks out of Eddie's family they owe me, but I question if I'll ever see. I've stalled on contacting them about it, and I know the longer I wait the harder it'll be, but... ugh. I'm avoiding "pain" and possibly losing out. Right now it's under the "I'll do it in the morning" category.

Speaking of "in the morning," I have class then, so I best wrap up. Not that I want to. I want to babble- it's like I'm talking to an old friend.

Can I lick you, diary? Right there? Mmm, what's that? Don't ask first?

Mmm, oh yeah... I'll just do.. I'll do...

*liiiiiick*

Mrreeeoooww- yeah.. I love you diary. You so sexy... yeah... you turn me on. I love you, I do... let's make out under the hot sun.

*smooch smooch smooch smooch grope*

Oh yeah!

"I do know where you go, is where I wanna be- where are you going?" - Dave Matthews Band

Reason for Terror # 82:

Using phrase "da bomb" unwittingly in phone tapped conversations could lead to arrest and beatings by the FBI, local authorities, and hip police.

Reason for Terror # 81:

There was a little bit of mold on that bread you had this morning.

Reason for Terror # 80:

When evening falls, you can try to drive away; but the moon will be following... always following...