National State of Alert:
(as of 3-8-04)

Personal State of Alert:
(as of 3-8-04)

Reason for Personal State of Alert:
- So this is post-college life? Really? *shivers*

- The Passion of Christ featured a deleted scene where Christ called me out and told me "You're next"

Featured Links:
Diaryland.com
OnlineOnslaught.com
MSNBC.com
QuietAmerican.org
MoneyCentral.msn.com
Tremble.com
Weezer.com
Fool.com
GirlsArePretty.com

joelthecat.diaryland.com

Morning One Month Later
2001-10-09 - 10:54 p.m.

"You said watch my head about it... My head about it... oh no, oh no, oh no" -Rufus Wainwright

Yeah, so, where was I?

I waited around for Ashleigh, though nothing happened, so I walked way down to the ATM, then to the nearest place serving breakfast, Deana's. I ordered a bacon egg and cheese biscuit, and stood around feeling uncomfortable. I got my food, sat near the back, and faced the front, cuz I like windows and seeing outside, like usual. I looked in my bag for something to distract me, and didn't really have anything. My mouth wouldn't open wide enough to eat, cuz I have something going on near my right jaw (wisdom tooth growing in, I discovered later, perhaps?)... my mind was already freaked out cuz of the whole anthrax thing, and cuz of the dreams of last night, and the pictures of city skylines framed in the shop, and... agh. The final straw being unable to eat, tears started forming in my eyes. And for the first time in a long time, I'm almost embarrassed.

After fighting back tears several time, I re-sat down and faced the other way. I didn't want the other SCAD student in there to witness me, or anyone else for that matter... cuz I knew anyone talking to me would set me off. I was fighting the feeling of being a victim, I refused. But between the dream, and the uncertainty of what the hell was going on, and my attempt at having a friend with me for comfort not workin out, and... agh. I had to crumble my sandwich to bits to eat, and I went through 'bout four napkins worth of eye wiping.

I got up, out, and decided okay, I need quiet time to work out whatever it was. The school library has booths on the third floor for students to be isolated from everyone and in a sound proof solo environment with no distraction. I decided to go over there to look for one. Unfortunately, all of them where taken by other students, or had "RESERVED" on them and were locked. So no dice there. I sat down in front of a computer for a bit, failed to log on, and left, heading to work an hour early.

I was mostly quiet, I filed, I just got on with work. I really wanted to just crawl into a ball in a corner somewhere. But I barely interacted with people... everyone at the office was nice enough... it was okay. I just got done what I needed to.

I was feeling a bit better by class time, and again, drowned myself in work. I decided to dedicate my class calender project to mundane household objects. January / February's image is a pencil. March and April's image is a cup. Oh yeah.

Actually... I decided to take it one step further. I'm going to do Household Objects: Swimsuit edition. Stealing a little from:

http://www.2001babeoftheyear.com/photos/moppyphotos/moppy/moppyphoto02.jpg

I'm going to take household objects and draw bras and panties on them. It should be beautious. I think a fork would look hot in underwear.

"Trying to get my mansions green, after I've grey gardens seen, honey won't you hold me tight, get me through grey gardens tonight" -Rufus Wainwright

Reason for Terror # 82:

Using phrase "da bomb" unwittingly in phone tapped conversations could lead to arrest and beatings by the FBI, local authorities, and hip police.

Reason for Terror # 81:

There was a little bit of mold on that bread you had this morning.

Reason for Terror # 80:

When evening falls, you can try to drive away; but the moon will be following... always following...